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Thursday, May 24, 2012

THE GHOST ARMY OF WORLD WAR II

By Jim McAllister


Note:  This article was originally published on April 27, 2005 in the NORTH SCOTTSDALE INDEPENDENTI was fascinated by the story of the ghost army and the bravery of those guys in World War II.  With Memorial Day arriving in a few days, I feel a tribute to them and our current fighting forces is appropriate with a reprint of that column....JM






I’m sure you are wondering, "What in the world was the ghost army of World War II?" It’s an interesting and fascinating story which is not that well known.


Ever since warfare has existed, armies have relied on some type of deception to gain an advantage on their opponents. Some ancient armies used plaster dummies, others used fake smoke signals and spies, and we all know about the famous Trojan horse. These ancient examples of deception were carried into modern warfare during World War II with the exploits of the ghost army or their actual title which was the 23rd Headquarters Special Troops.


The ghost army was a unique and little known group of American soldiers who played a big part in the Allied victory over Germany through their abilities in the art of deception. Even though information on this unit became available about thirty years ago, not much has been written about them. As World War II faded into history, so did the 23rd Special Troops.


The ghost army was organized by Lieutenant Colonel Merrick Truly. He was the executive officer in charge of these deception experts. Although Truly’s men reported to the American ground commander in Europe, General Omar Bradley, most of the American soldiers did not know of the existence of the Special Troops. They operated at night under strictly special orders and were not even required to give their identity to superior officers.


Former Scottsdale resident Dr Harold 
Laynor, a member of the 23rd Special
Troops. (Laynor Museum)
The ghost army consisted of 82 officers and 1,023 enlisted men. With their eclectic mixture of talents, they were strictly in the deception business. The Special Troops were made up of four units: a sonic deception company, a special radio company, a company of combat engineers, and a battalion of camoufleurs. They served with four armies in five European countries in five major campaigns from D-Day (June 6, 1944) until the end of the war in 1945.


The most unique part of this already unique group was the composition of its members. Many of these men were already famous as artists, sculptors, architects, literary figures, and others from the world of the arts and humanities. Actor Douglas Fairbanks, Jr. was perhaps the most well known for his Hollywood successes, but there was also renowned fashion designer Bill Blass, Olin Dows: a prominent artist, George Diestal: a Hollywood set designer, Art Kane: a fashion photographer, and Harold Laynor, whose artistic works depicting World War II and other subjects, are shown in galleries throughout the country.



The Special Troops used six major methods of deception: camouflaging troops and tanks, placing dummy tanks and artillery, firing pyrotechnics to simulate actual artillery fire, the use of artificial sound effects, using artificial radio communication, and using fake special effects. This created an atmosphere of great danger as they needed to be in close to front line battles.


"Dummy" aircraft used for deception (Laynor Museum)
Although these brave men were involved in at least twenty other confrontations with the enemy, their biggest contribution was probably at the battle between Allied Forces and Germany at the Rhine River on March 23, 1945. Their contributions were essential in weakening the German assault and forcing Germany to surrender two months later in May of 1945.


Although records and information concerning the 23rd Headquarters Special Troops are sketchy, the aforementioned artist Harold Laynor (1922-1991) made a series of fifty paintings covering two years of participating in World War II. His works include paintings of army buddies, aspects of training and, as the series progresses, he relates the brutality and horror of war.


Like the above mentioned celebrities participating in the 23rd, Dr. Laynor was highly distinguished in his field. Although he used primarily watercolors for his World War II work, he was also a pioneer in the use of lacquer as a medium of painting and the use of 3D paintings for the blind.


The Laynor Foundation website (www.laynor.org) has valuable information concerning the ghost army and also features seven galleries of Dr. Laynor’s World War II paintings. They are very interesting and illustrative of that terrible time in our history.


Optical illusions, bluffs, sleight of hand, misinformation, disappearing acts: all part of the ghost army of World War II; a brave and cunning bunch of guys who were instrumental in giving us the lifestyle we enjoy today. 

88 comments:

Rick Kepple said...

Cool. Sun Tzu said, all war is deception.

mike slater said...

The Americans and the Brits were both good at using deception during WW11.

midnightsstaff said...

Will WWII go down as the last war this nation actually fought to win?
try this crap today and the NYT would be doing in depth multi part expose's on how the dept. of defense is engaging in trickery and sleight of hand tactics along with full page photos of the mock ups and quotes by pfc's of their outrage at being included in deliberate deceptive practices..
this is just another rear view mirror look at the America we have abandoned so we can be considered as progressive and enlightened.
think I am being overly cynical?
Just consider for the moment that the doctor that worked in concert with the intelligence that pinpointed OBL's hiding place was deliberately outted by those who should know better and now in Pakistani prison for his efforts.

U.S. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta, who as CIA director oversaw the U.S. raid on bin Laden, said in an interview aired Wednesday on the "CBS Evening News" that Afridi was "very helpful" with the operation.

"For them to take this kind of action against somebody who was helping to go after terrorism, I just think is a real mistake on their part," he said.

It would be foolish for anyone in the future to assist this gang of incompetents because once the mission is accomplished to their satisfaction you are on your own and they will turn you out in a heartbeat...
that did not happen in WWII America.

Rick Kepple said...

Fake equipment is used to this day with great success! The USSR created fake equipment to fool our spy planes. Area 51 was a psy-ops program to target the Soviets with fantasy hi-tech equipment and they even parked cardboard spy planes in view of satellites. Deception is as old as the species.

In Genesis, the devil used deception to fool Eve into believing that she could be an equal with God. Gideon's Trumpets was psychological warfare and music was used against Noriega in the same way. The Trojan Horse. The Doolittle Raid on Tokyo did barely anything, but was heavy in psychological warfare. Even now, the news is full of psychological warfare against our enemies and our enemies do the same to us.

Jim McAllister said...

Mike,

I admire the Brits for their courage in WWII. Imagine our cities getting bombed like London did and having someone like Obama in charge. He would probably be apologizing to Hitler for having fog get in the way.

Fortunately for them, they had Churchill who took over for an inept Chamberlain who caved to Hitler.

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

You're probably right. As bad as Obama wants us to be friendly with the Muslims it isn't going to ever happen regardless of his bowing and scraping.

We need more guys running the show like Patton in WWII.

It's too bad it has to be that way but that is the world today. Sometimes we need to show our "big stick" regardless of other's feelings being hurt. They need to know that we are a friendly nation but don't screw with us. I think that attitude would instill some second thoughts from our enemies.

Jim McAllister said...

Rick,

The Trojan Horse has to be one of the earliest deceptions.

The ghost army had quite an array of characters like Dr Laynor. He was an artist who depicted the horror of ware in his works (see laynor.org).

Douglas Fairbanks Jr. played many swashbuckling roles in film and got a lot more into realism by being a member of the Special Troops.

Then there was Bill Blass who was into style and clothing design along with others in the fantasy world of Hollywood.

Brave SOBs for sure and we were lucky to have them.

Rick Kepple said...

I absolutely love psychological military operations. It's like defeating the enemy with very little effort.

In World War II, U.S. military intelligence played upon the superstitious fears of the Nazi's. At one point, a giant manican was created and shambled through the countryside creating flashes of lights and loud bangs! Usually it was done around peasants loyal to the Nazi's and it was reported that they ran for their lives at the fire breathing giant! Pre-Google obviously.

It's said that they even infiltrated fortune-tellers and gave false predictions to superstitious Nazis.

During a Filipino war, the U.S. military haunted the Huk battleground creating the impression that ghosts and eerie creatures lived there. Rumors were distributed about witnesses having seen them!

During the Vietnam War, the U.S. military created "Wandering Soul," to mess with the minds of the Vietnamese and their belief in the paranormal that the fallen soldiers haunted them.

midnightsstaff said...

Those villagers had every right to believe that place was voodoo central, it was the spookiest place I was ever at, I saw some of the weirdest stuff one can imagine, things that can only be relived over a bottle of decent whisky... I don't think the CIA could have pulled off what was going on all over that godawful country.
I hope we can somehow avoid getting involved in that European mess that is around the corner, no amount of psych-ops works when people have nothing left to lose.

but not to wander so far off topic so soon...

There was a bit of sleight of hand going on back home with rationing and war drives and such.. most of those drives were meaningless other than a cheerleading gig for the government, something to give the illusion they were involved in something much bigger than themselves...
how about all these ridiculous PSA's they run on KFYI and other stations, about making sure you get your tax dodge, food stamps and abortions- talk about a decades long taxpayer funded psych-ops advertising program all to create a larger dependent class..
some things never change.
bag over head, do what you are told and try not to think about it.

mike slater said...

The Germans were convinced that the invasion of Europe would be at the Pas de calais lead by American general George S. Patton Jr. who they considered the the best combat general in the American army and the one they feared the most.

midnightsstaff said...

Modern government might be the definition of deception, we have come to the point where the deception we uncover might in reality be a deception in itself.

(Housing prices bottomed Ethyl! we are in recovery- I heard it on CNBC)

Those mock ups were designed to fool a cursory inspection, Intelligence in itself whether it be good or not is not static commodity there is always new information coming in that needs to be digested and justified against existing intelligence.. so all they had to do was to establish credibility and much of that credibility has to do with the willingness of the opposition to accept information as valid.

(good news Ethyl!... I read the unemployment has fallen this month! we are in recovery)

Once the Germans bit on the ruse it had done what it intended, attention had move on so usually at that point inspecting and verification practically ceases because do you really want to be a contrarian in the light of accepted opinion?
In truth a couple of well placed spys working on or near the project should have rendered it useless in the war effort.

Are UFO sightings and the cottage industry springing up around it part of a large psych ops program designed to intimidate other nations into believing we have either alien technology or advanced R&D projects rendering their technology ineffective?

I keep hearing rumor of a death ray or a death star platform on the drawing boards..

Once manipulated the human mind takes charge and tends to run with the conclusion it makes whether it is factually based or not- trial lawyers realize that eye witnesses are the weak link in any conviction and successfully attack them as unreliable.. of course this sounds like something the government would be all over to me-
lies covering for lies until the pathway to truth is so byzantine no one can recognize it without the program the government conveniently provides- they must control the media..

Rick Kepple said...

Well you're right about the psy-ops and controlling the human mind in a kind of passive warfare, Middy. I had not realized that you had visited the Huk battleground.

I was talking to an intelligence officer recently and I brought up those dreams from the 80's, and I watched the hair on his neck stand up in a response. So just imagine those Americans creating even more ghosty stuff in the Huk Battlefield. I'll bet their were really freaked out following orders!

It's funny from the outside, all we see are the results of bloody conflict, but few people actually know every dirty trick that is pulled on our enemies to make them piss their pants.

midnightsstaff said...

What I am talking about was not the same thing as you are talking about Rick.. I am talking of things I witnessed personally.

I contend there were true forces at play the military would have no means of controlling and probably there would be similar reports of this type from the soldiers in the War between the States to the WWII combat vets right along with every misery filled theater of combat in history, certainly one that had experienced ongoing war for over fifteen years and counting. gotta wonder what the ghost count would have been in either Pot Pol Cambodia or 1944 Poland.
Remember, the French who spent decades building a tiger infested jungle into a miserable third world hovel left a lot more than their contribution to the gene pool of the Saigon whorehouses..
This topic is interesting Jim, in fact you could with a bit of editing forward the same type of disinformation and mock up in the campaign of 2008.
we simply fell for a mock up instead of what he really represented...
that won't happen twice.

Rick Kepple said...

Deception in war is the art of misleading the enemy. Deception must always be believable. The perfect deception makes an enemy defeat themselves.

In civilian life, the use of fraud is illegal. In wartime, the use of deception is glorious!

Rick Kepple said...

Pol Pot was allowed to exist and there is some evidence that the U.S. government supported him. It makes sense. He killed his own people, thereby reducing the population.

Bernie Madoff was one of the greatest deceptions ever allowed to exist and enemy countries illegally invested with him and lost their entire wealth! When the richest of Americans are done with someone, they throw them away.

Why else would they allow American jobs to be outsourced to foreign countries, except to gain their allegiance, but as in Pakistan's case (bin Laden), the deception doesn't actually work! But hey, the right people got rich, and that's all that matters in the Bigger Picture of things.

Strategic experts have concluded that this bad economy will force new changes in military forces, missions, and a new strategy that they say is long overdue.

Obama and Romney are both investments used by the richest of tyrants.

So what do you do with military veterans who were useful once, but expensive to care for? Screw with their lives and push them to suicide, or give them dangerous drugs. Starve them. Prevent them from being successful. Say they're a friend then ignore them when they're in trouble.

One of these days, military veterans are going to take this nation back from both parties. It's gonna happen soon, I think.

Jim McAllister said...

From anonymous:

Very useful blog. Keep up the good work.

Thanks,

JM

Jim McAllister said...

Rick,

In World War II, U.S. military intelligence played upon the superstitious fears of the Nazi's. At one point, a giant manican was created and shambled through the countryside creating flashes of lights and loud bangs! Usually it was done around peasants loyal to the Nazi's and it was reported that they ran for their lives at the fire breathing giant! Pre-Google obviously.

That's very interesting and brilliant warfare. prey on the superstitions.

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

things that can only be relived over a bottle of decent whisky..

My favorite, Southern Comfort I presume. LOL

Items like Rita Hayworth giving the bumpers off her Lincoln Zephyr to the war effort seemed a bit contrived but Hollywood did do a lot to help the war effort. I think victory gardens were a big help too.

As far as Lucky Strike Green going to war, I'm not so sure. I think they just wanted to update the package design to influence more women to smoke.

Jim McAllister said...

Mike,

I loved guys like Patton. He was a no nonsense SOB and a great general who knew how to fight a war. He also was a great historian of war.

I never tire of seeing George C. Scott play him. He had that part down pat.

Jim McAllister said...

Rick,

"So what do you do with military veterans who were useful once, but expensive to care for? Screw with their lives and push them to suicide, or give them dangerous drugs. Starve them. Prevent them from being successful. Say they're a friend then ignore them when they're in trouble."

Remember Napolitano's comment three years ago that she considered returning GI's as possible "terrorist risks."

That's the kind of crap we have to put up with in this administration from Obama on down. Remember that on election day!

Maybe guys like you, me, Middy and the rest of the vets around here who either joined the military or were drafted should take offense to that comment from her and dust off our brogans and get ready to have our say.

Rick Kepple said...

Jim, before Napolitano's report, two of Missouri's state police officers leaked "The Modern Militia Movement" report from the MIAC department saying that anyone reading Tom Clancy, believing in the New World Order, believing in the Anti-Christ, Ron Paul supporters, listened to Chuck Baldwin, supporters of third party candidates opponents of gun control, opponents of illegal immigration, opponents of the Federal Reserve, opponents of the IRS and Christian military veterans are likely to be potential terrorists. Again, the report was distributed to the Missouri Highway Patrol and two state cops released it to an Oregon newspaper. Likely, no one else would print it.

The post morphine thing is interesting. I know a lot more than I knew before, and maybe the government got what they wanted.

You have to remember that someone else must always be the cause of a change of policy. For example, I set a comment on Citi's page, because they are predators. I said that today they'll get away with it, but they used Bernie Madoff and sooner or later, they'll be done with Citi too.

And that rock star who claimed that she was my friend sacrificed herself for the cause by doing her usual nothing.

midnightsstaff said...

"Pol Pot was allowed to exist and there is some evidence that the U.S. government supported him. It makes sense. He killed his own people, thereby reducing the population"

kinda tossing off a few million people including the brightest of that nation pretty easily there Rick... try to keep in mind those were real people just like you and me who were herded out of their cities and butchered or left to die of exposure in a very hostile climate.

Cambodia has not recovered as a nation with it's entire professional, business and educated class subject to a holocaust might be expected..

As a wise man once noted upon warning the world of the perils of collectivism.. "If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever"
George Orwell

this election is the very last chance we will get to make a choice in our future, politics is not a game at street level and what I mean is in four more years of raw socialism there will simply not be enough votes to ever have any sense of sanity altho I have to admit the Republicans are going to have to reinvent themselves to deal with the disaster we are living.
Yeah.. happy Memorial day to all you people and especially my fellow vets, this is a good time to reflect on the serious nature of our history and was it better not all that long ago than what will our future be without some positive change- we have suffered three years of plain old garden variety socialist change hopefully one good burn will do the trick so Homer and Marge will have learned something.
At least that's what passes for optimism around these parts.

Rick Kepple said...

Middy, life sucks. "try to keep in mind those were real people just like you and me who were herded out of their cities and butchered or left to die of exposure in a very hostile climate." In the early 80's, I ate plain oatmeal, no sugar, no milk for breakfast every morning for months at a time. I worked for a wealthy dude for a dollar an hour. Take it or leave it, he said. (Reagan fixed his wagon after I joined the Army) Families could not afford to feed anyone but their own. I was reduced to stealing to survive. So if I survived, why didn't Pol Pot's victims just run away? Why didn't they form up and fight back? Moreover, why did so many obey orders to kill the rest? Why?

The fact is that people could choose to live a free life, but they always hope that someone else will do something. To the last moment of their life, they pray to God, they stall for time, they hope tomorrow will be better. For most, it's the same or worse.

The reality is that this world doesn't have to be so violent. People choose to only help themselves and that's why monsters exist.

steve buzzardo said...

"how about all these ridiculous PSA's they run on KFYI and other stations"

Middy,
I wonder if the radio stations realize how annoying those damn PSA's are. After hearing 1000 times that I should get a flu shot I feel like I putting a bullet thru my skull.

steve buzzardo said...

Jim,
speaking of ghosts of WWII, I just heard yesterday that a WWII fighter was found last month somewhere in the Sahara desert in Egypt. The pilot walked away and his body was never found.

It reminds me of the story of the "Lady Be Good" the B-24 that disappeared during the war and was found in the desert 20 years later.

Jim McAllister said...

Steve,

PSA's do get old after a while. They should call some of them "Piss-off" I'm sure the stations would rather sell the time too.

It's amazing how every now and then one of those old planes show up. How about all that stuff from the Japan earthquake last year washing up in California and British Columbia.

Nature is tough to figure out.

midnightsstaff said...

Yeah then you throw in all the problems the military has had in the Bermuda triangle and some of these crazy tales like The Philadelphia Incident.. and it makes you wonder..
and just what's up with that ancient clay warrior find in China?

X-files was a documentary..

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

I haven't heard much about the Bermuda Triangle lately. For a while, it was like anything going there disappeared. Do you think Atlantis has something to do with that? LOL

What is the Philadelphia incident?

Rick Kepple said...

Speaking of ghosts ... I gathered some wild roses, daisies, other flowers for my wife's urn. Cleaned my handgun today, got some war movies from Blockbuster to watch and some new ones too.

midnightsstaff said...

There was an indoor movie house in Oceanside that showed "The Sands of Iwa Jima" twentyfour seven for decades.. nothing else just the same flick and it was a sell out..
talk about psych ops...
probably the only filler they might have considered running occasionally would be "Old Yeller", but then right back to John Wayne's classic.
thinking back it's laughable that someone with my locked up mindset as Cj might suggest could be completely broken down and molded into doing something completely out of my character... but it happened to every damn one of us.. nothing to be ashamed of, these guys were professional psychologists.. kidding yourself if you think otherwise.
part of growing up is coming to realize one's own actual limitations and dealing with getting around that impediment to life all of us face.
na Rick your hard times were exceptional only due to your own familiarity.. but the fate of millions of people who are no longer living is proof that your life is not as bad as you think.
toughest battle in life is seeing possibilities rather than obstructions.

midnightsstaff said...

or maybe it was Iwo Jima..lol.

Rick Kepple said...

Middy, the obstacles shall ever be, but they are just different ones as time passes. Some may never be overcome, but merely endured. I kinda think I'm more concerned with the kind of opportunities that I can afford.

One man vs Pol Pot and it could have been done, given the right circumstances. Millions of lives could have been spared, but one man can't defeat political obstacles.

Jim, the Philidelphia experiment concerned E=MC2. The military was trying to cloak a ship and may have discovered time travel by accident. It's said that an echo in time was created and it began reappearing in 1980 and vanished again years later. I don't think it actually materialized as a solid, but more of an apparition. The was a tech officer in my unit and he knew the experiment. They used miles and miles of wire to create huge coils. When power was turned on, it created a magnetic field effect. It's said that the echo will repeat in 2013.

The New York Times reported that the government did create a "time cloaking" device and the Pentagon has control of it now. Theoretically, they could kidnap a dictator in full view of the public and no one would notice.

Rick Kepple said...

Remember that intelligence officer that I told you about? Well, last week, I investigated on a tip and now the military is targeting enemies. That's all I can say. Just got the confirmation by email. I was right. Al Qaeda.

Rick Kepple said...

Jim, the last comment is mostly BS, but I can't really tell the truth.

Rick Kepple said...

Good morning y'all. That independent film, "Chained," isn't bad. It's about an Army Ranger who took his wife back from slavers. It's kind of like the movie, "Taken," but on a very small budget. The young kidnapped girl in "Chained," made the movie though and the bimbo act did it. But just imagine the kidnappers posing as American soldiers to gain the trust of American women. Understand?

midnightsstaff said...

Lots of people have that same problem, they can't tell the truth.
maybe you should have gone into politics.

"Winding down these long wars is enabling us to replace and rebalance our foreign policy, to take on the full range of challenges that will shape the 21st century, challenges different than those of the 20th century,"
and then
"The most critical relationship to get right is that between the United States and China. Every day the affairs of our nations and the livelihoods of our citizens become more connected"

Looks like Joe Biden is in charge of encouraging the troops by a couple of remarks he made last week at the graduation at West Point.
I guess the president is just too busy speaking to half filled high school auditoriums, shaking down protection money and walking point on the war again women to attend the graduation ceremonies for our elite members of the military
so Joe went instead.
wonder how many of those graduates have any respect at all for this administration.
Something tells me with advanced satellite reconnaissance it will take a bit more than a few Hollywood sets to fool the Chinese or Russians.

Rick Kepple said...

It's not like that Middy.

Ever see those annoying porn posts on the Internet? The people kidnapping those women are posing as American soldiers to gain their trust. The military is tracking them and I want our women back.

I got involved because one of my friends was a target.

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

I love The Sands of Iwo Jima, a great John Wayne flick and one of the few where he dies.

It's great to see how the military used to be when Senators weren't telling Sergeants to speak nicer to the troops because one of his constituents complained. This actually happened at Lackland in Texas.

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

One would think Obama would be smart enough to know that sending Biden anywhere will always result in something going wrong. Biden is an idiot and a plagiarizer on top of it but I love the guy for how much he keeps helping us out against Obama.

If it isn't the gay marriage embarrassment or alienating all the plumbers in America, he is calling Romney "President Romney" and Obama "President Clinton."

What a guy!

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

Did you see where Newport Beach is billing Obama $35,000 for the extra work they had to do providing extra police, etc. for Obama's visit?

Do you think he will pay?

Rick Kepple said...

Well Jim, Air Force soldiers are pampered anyway, but abuse does exist. If the chain of command doesn't work, it is necessary to report the problem to legislators.

Rick Kepple said...

Newport Beach administrators sure have some balls. They need to suck it up.

Did you hear about the gay advisor who quit the Romney campaign? Read the USA Today. It's in there today.

Rick Kepple said...

Oh gee, I forgot that you don't want to know about the real world problems! And I suspect that you might have been that sergeant, Jimmy. And everything wrong is the fault of the Democrats! Everything right is thanks to the Republicans. Nobody trusts the Republicans anymore, except the rich. Obama will probably have a landslide victory.

Rick Kepple said...

Okay, you guys need to chill out. Go count some money or something.

So the neighbor asked to borrow some toilet paper. Why in the hell would I wish to LOAN out toilet paper? That's implying that he's gonna bring it back when he's done with it. That's just a disgusting question to ask.

Rick Kepple said...

Okay, you guys need to chill out. Go count some money or something.

So the neighbor asked to borrow some toilet paper. Why in the hell would I wish to LOAN out toilet paper? That's implying that he's gonna bring it back when he's done with it. That's just a disgusting question to ask.

Rick Kepple said...

Okay, you guys need to chill out. Go count some money or something.

So the neighbor asked to borrow some toilet paper. Why in the hell would I wish to LOAN out toilet paper? That's implying that he's gonna bring it back when he's done with it. That's just a disgusting question to ask.

Rick Kepple said...

Stupid computers.

midnightsstaff said...

Damn... got lowballed on that Maserati I bid on auction.. just as well I don't really need two anyway...
Gulfstream repairmen are bigger bandits than the Porsche guy I used to keep on retainer, if it's not the price of JP going up it's some damn FAA regulation allowing these guys to pad normal maintenance with an apprentice to carry his putter I guess, just can't catch a break.. their bleeding me I tell ya, might as well put a gun in my ribs..
Jim I think you ought to sell off those thoroughbreds, I know it's a pretty good tax dodge for you but when's the last time you had to even see any of those horses because you have been so wound up in this Scottsdale 2100 architecture project for the Goldwater Group designing high rise detention centers for Sheriff Joe?
sometimes I think you keep the ponies just so you can take your picture next to one of the jockeys...
I think I've seen one. lol..
We all understand the politics of the eastside and know there is much more than just a rumor that Arpaio actually gets... no make that "takes" his orders from you.. what we are supposed to believe that on Saturday night any eating joint in town is somehow always going to find a table that just became "available" for you and Barb despite a two week reservation wait for the rest of us?

I guess you can keep up the illusion of some Ozzie Nelson type joesixpackeverybody'snextdoorneighbor but we know the truth, nothing gets done in Northern Scottsdale unless you either come up with the idea or somehow receive compensation to let it happen.
that's how a shotcaller rolls.
Well thanks for inviting me in Rick, yeah I see what you mean.. you know the echos and such... nice place to visit but I really don't think I belong.
Pedro.

Jim McAllister said...

Rick,

So the neighbor asked to borrow some toilet paper. Why in the hell would I wish to LOAN out toilet paper? That's implying that he's gonna bring it back when he's done with it. That's just a disgusting question to ask.

I guess it depends if he is going to use both sides of the paper. It's a great idea; it cuts your toilet paper cost in half!

Rick Kepple said...

Oh Lord, won't ya buy me a John Deere? My friends all have Porches, and fancy beer.

I'd sell those Thoroughbreds off Middy. They're only good for racing, English riding and dogfood.

I Googled "Pedro" for a slur. Didn't turn up, so insults don't actually work if the intended victim has no fricking idea what the hell you're talking about. Next time provide racist examples.

RIck Kepple said...

I'm collecting used toilet paper to build a toilet paper bunker. Fake of course. It will appear to be naturally camoflaged. When the UN comes, I want to see those soldiers go in it to search for weapons made from recycled dog poo.

Jim McAllister said...

Rick,

No, I was never a sergeant. I was a captain (railroad tracks). Well, in my own mind anyway. I was actually an Airman First Class (3 stripes) and proud of it.

Everything right is thanks to the Republicans. Nobody trusts the Republicans anymore, except the rich.

.....and how do you think we got rich? I'll tell you: we worked hard and never took a cent of welfare. We penny pinched to get through college then we worked hard to get ahead in a free enterprise world that didn't depend on a bunch of lazy ass bureaucrats to pass laws to give everyone free stuff.

What makes you think that government phonies know more about business than those who have private ownership? Government programs are proven failures and we are stuck with a president that guys like you glorify and he has never worked a day in his life. he is too busy sealing up and hiding his history. What is he ashamed of that we are not supposed to know about?

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

I wouldn't know how to live without my two Maseratis. I don't know how you make it with only one. I keep a convertible and a sedan depending on my mood and I must admit I am quite moody. Why, just the other night I had to fire my wine steward for being a degree off on the temperature of my cabernet. I simply WILL NOT tolerate chilled Cabernet! All the members of my club backed me; it was outrageous!

I gave up on Gulfstream years ago. I told them that without Corinthian leather seats, I was finished with them.

I have to go now. We always have Wagwu beef and imported Brussel's sprouts on Sunday evening on the patio and Jarvis the butler just informed me that the sun is setting at just the right angle for a fine Wagwu dinner.

For now it's Ta Ta to you and Rick.

midnightsstaff said...

bravo.. well played Jimmy well played indeed!!
hey might as well have some fun - what the hell with no hockey to watch for a few days gotta do something to keep the old gray matter movin'
bout' time to put on the Ummagumma live disc on - can't wait for "careful with that ax eugene"- live version..
google that.
Pedro z.

Rick Kepple said...

Jim, Middy, I just don't believe that either of you are self-made success stories. I've heard it all before and somewhere along the line, someone helped you. I know they did, because I AM a self-made man. It's extremely hard work to be honest and to make it alone. Completely alone. No one makes it to Scottsdale alone. No one. It's impossible. Even Jim has admitted that he's got a stock broker. So you made your money alone, huh? Sing me another tune boys. And cut the sound track.

midnightsstaff said...

Made my first hundred thousand in lawn jockey refurbishing.. more demand in the northern side of town than you might think- those GWI Republithugs cry like little girls but end up usually paying top dollar for a good piece of period art..
Medieval information extraction devices with a premium paid for authentic Spanish items were for some reason popular as well..
I got some real nice knockoffs from a Chinese broker and with a little artistic distressing they looked like they might have gotten the truth out of quite a few miscreants, heretics and Jews.

Life has no guarantees Rick, I remember back to one of my less than successful business ventures in Klansman style robes targeting the Oklahoma and Texas Pentecostal youth market.

It sure sounded like a sure winner when my uncle let me in on it, just goes to show the fickleness of current fashion has put more than just the Mode O Day and Izod clothing line out of business.

On the other hand still I have a warehouse full of inventory that could be had at a fair price- they run large and I got all sizes from toddler to equestrian- white only, and I'm talking about the hoods.

Too bad I retired and lost my jobber contacts before this hoodie thing really took off, maybe a line of breathable light weight hoodies so even if it's a hundred and twenty in the shade if there was some shade a young entrepreneur in Maryville or Scottsdale can look professional and still maintain his cool..
And the bright side if Obama should happen to win there could be a new target area for those fashionable hoodies with the finance officers of Wall Street right down to the office manager at the Bank of America..
ya gotta be willing to adjust to market conditions.

Making another bucketfull of filthy lucre just doesn't appeal to my new found awareness of esthetics..
In fact that is another commonality we share Rick, we have both done well and no longer allow the siren song of the pointless pursuit of wealth to cloud our thinking, we both enjoy the freedom to think outside the box and enjoy life for what it brings.

Happy Memorial Day!

Rick Kepple said...

You were a lawn jockey Middy? Yeah, leave it to rich guys to hire real people to stand in their yards dressed as jockeys.

I remember when I thought President Carter would fix the economy and I'd never starved before. Other people took lessons. I like to learn on my own. Dirt tastes like dirt. Roadkill isn't bad.

But now I'm unable to work. There should be do-overs

CJ Phoenix said...

Borrowing TP? Now that's just wrong on many levels. I mean, even I know that one doesn't necessarily have to run to the store or a neighbor's house to find something to use to wipe with & I was born & raised in the city ... And even if you are completely out of reading material -- in Phoenix, the New Times works especially well & it is free -- aren't you surrounded by trees in those hills, Rick?

Rick Kepple said...

So let's suppose the country melted down tomorrow. From the lessons that Jimmy presented; what would you do to defend your home?

I still think that the fake toilet paper bunker would work. Charmin's squeezability stops bullets.

Jim McAllister said...

Rick,

It's not a difficult formula to understand how to be successful. The hard part is implementing the formula.

In my case, I went to college after my military obligation. After graduation I got a job which I would never have gotten without my BA. That is the purpose of a degree: to go to the front of the line.

I also married a girl I met in college who also got a job because of her teaching degree. No degree? No job; pretty simple.

After we saved a decent amount of money, of course, we went to someone with the expertise of finance. He was (and is) a bright guy and investing is his field. Why should I try it myself? Why not use an expert? I don't tell him how to invest money and he doesn't tell me how to sell end caps of products to grocery stores. Ya gotta do what ya gotta do!

It's all pretty simple. You go to the experts.

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

Lawn jockeys? Light weight hoodies? Mode O' Day? LOL!

I'd like to make an appointment to see you. I might buy your whole inventory. I hear those lawn jockeys are making a comeback at the horse farms in Kentucky.

Jim McAllister said...

CJ,

Which is exactly why I said to use both sides of the toilet paper. It saves money and reduces the chance of running out. That is something no one wants to do as those red and white corn cobs are not as plentiful as before.

I was a sad day in the country when Monkey Wards went out of business!

Jim McAllister said...

Rick,

Funny you should mention Charmin. I watched an old Bob Newhart show on Hallmark Channel and Mr. Whipple (Dick Wilson) had a small part.

He lived to be about 95 and made a hell of a lot more money as Mr. Whipple than from acting bit parts.

midnightsstaff said...

Well it seems there has been an even larger campaign of disinformation going on right here in this nation for over thirty years.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=-0YgDAmR-gg#!

Here's a younger version of the only person that has run for president with his opinion years ago on this ongoing scandal..
This is Memorial day what better day to ignore the obvious and continue to listen to those who don't have our national interests in mind...

nobody really gives a damn because they don't understand the issue.
Google GHWB and you will find out his nickname was "Poppy" when he was running the CIA- any guesses why?

Yeah, once the money aspect was formerly interjected into the equation by Dick Nixon introducing the war on drugs into legislation the CIA slush fund was officially given a blank check to operate..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=DvRhUZnc7F0#!

...and operate they have- there is a very good reason we are still occupying Afghanistan and other worthless areas of the globe.

Ask the average conservative version of Homer or Marge and you will notice they get warm fuzzy feelings when you bring up the CIA so effective has been the propaganda, but some of us actually see the agency as merely the sword of destruction of a globalist government entity that really doesn't care what it takes or what it destroys in their power grab.

I didn't find this in Rick's anxiety closet, it is right in full view of everyone who gives a shit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=5_UbAmRGSYw#!

hell, even 60 minutes has been trying to warn us.

Rick Kepple said...

CJ, I didn't borrow TP. I gave a roll to the neighbor and yes, they also live in the woods. I have sympathy for Welfare cases, but they don't even try to be independent! They're trained by the government and corporations. I grow a garden, I try to find ways to make money and I have a lot of failures, but I keep trying! I try to be a good American, but our society is a lie. One of my friends who moved to Tucson said that life is very different in Arizona. He said that Oscar Meyer bacon is $1.29. In Missouri, it's almost four bucks! The Internet connection speeds are faster. I can't sell my property. Nothing is selling.

Rick Kepple said...

Jim, I am blacklisted where I live. You might have lived near KC at one time, but you never lived in the Ozarks. You can't believe the shit that I've endured to survive.

I don't have a college degree, but the schools are so bad that I could teach, but it pays less than disability here. Math teacher. I said that I can't do math and they said it didn't matter. Scary.

Rick Kepple said...

"Google GHWB and you will find out his nickname was "Poppy" when he was running the CIA- any guesses why?" - Middy.

And there's not a damned thing anyone can do about it. They're untouchable. Everyone knew, but orders are orders.

I became a journalist after the Army because I didn't like it. I figured they'd eventually make me a patsy. I keep my mouth shut, but I rarely ever help the Republicans knowing what I do.

You be careful Middy. They can get to your doctor. They can make your life like mine.

Jim McAllister said...

Middy and everyone else,

Check this one minute tape from some twerp on MSNBC about how he can't bring himself to call our fallen soldiers "heroes."

This is typical of the liberal mindset and I'm only glad to see him appear on MSNBC where that type of opinion over our fighting soldiers is dominant.

Who the hell is Chris Hayes anyway?

http://newsbusters.org/blogs/mark-finkelstein/2012/05/27/chris-hayes-im-uncomfortable-calling-fallen-military-heroes#ixzz1w6mBDLvo

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

Heavy stuff; the CIA in the drug business?

I wonder how that stands today.

midnightsstaff said...

Ron Paul's vision is the only hope we really have today and I mean his message!
NOT!! somehow getting him elected on a third party ticket.
I love that guy but honest to god we simply cannot let anyone become a distraction to getting this son of a bitch fired the first Tuesday this November...

I'm going to Maryville to DG's ink guy if he still is out on parole and get myself a Mitt Romney tattoo, anyone else going with me?
Paula?.. anyone??

sorry about that earlier rant Jim, but I honestly believe that the CIA and both parties are using the war on drugs to create a large slush fund for furthering the police state we already live in.. for any that I might have offended I apologize sincerely but to the rest I say we need to put down this ignorant red vs. blue proxy fight and get the government cleaned up at the ballot box because they are simply too powerful any longer to approach directly.. but that's only one muppet's opinion.

CJ Phoenix said...

Stay away from the fuzzy clearance bacon, Rick. Even the store brand bacon costs more than $1.29 here -- Safeway brand bacon was on sale for 2 for 6 just last week ... And your situation with your neighbor reminds me of an old proverb that goes something like this: If you give a man a few squares of TP, you clean his ass for a short period of time. But if you teach a man how to fend for himself -- tell him that the great outdoors is full of usable stuff to wipe with but spraying him with the hose next time he asks might work too -- then he will never ask to borrow TP ever again.

Rick Kepple said...

CJ, maybe people had good luck teaching me to fend for myself after my parents died, but it doesn't work for everyone. I kinda figure that you already know that. I figured that the low bacon price was too good to be true. Thanks.

The CIA, Wall Street, both political parties and the entertainment business are all allegedly in the drug business and there's nothing that can be done about it. That's just the way things are.

Middy ... slush fund? I think it might be a bit deeper than that, but I like the way you think.

Rick Kepple said...

Yeah, Obama doesn't seem to be too hot on soldiers or veterans. Seems he can pronounce Job Corps correctly, but mispronounced corpsman.

Was the Miami wacko the first of the zombie attacks? Apparently they ignore other people when they are feasting, so they should be easy to kill.

I think Washington D.C. is full of zombies so when the carnage begins, it would be a good excuse to get rid of some of them. Yeah, I'm talking to you armed people in D.C. ... do us all a favor ...

midnightsstaff said...

www.zombiebaitproject.com
keep it under your hat...

Jim McAllister said...

Cj,

Fuzzy clearance bacon? LOL Good one, at 1.29 gotta be fuzzy!

Jim McAllister said...

Rick,

Here is a comparison of crime between Wash DC and Phoenix.

Phoenix has three times the population. Washington is an embarrassment.

http://www.areaconnect.com/crime/compare.htm?c1=washington&s1=DC&c2=phoenix&s2=AZ

steve buzzardo said...

On this Memorial Day, Lincoln put it best at Gettysburg;
"We honor those who died so that this nation might live."

Jim McAllister said...

To: everyone

More on the Chris Hayes comments on MSNBC. This time the VFW is after him.

This is the type the liberals are raising these days.

He noted it's "very difficult to talk about the war dead and the fallen without invoking valor, without invoking the words 'heroes.'"

Hayes tried to explain why that makes him uneasy: "I feel ... uncomfortable about the word hero because it seems to me that it is so rhetorically proximate to justifications for more war."

I love that last line!

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2012/05/28/host-draws-vfw-rebuke-for-saying-uncomfortable-calling-fallen-soldiers-heroes/#ixzz1wBzZnSR1

midnightsstaff said...

Nothing these guys do anymore surprises me, they know a siege when they see one and it's Obama doing everything possible to make sure they have nothing to work with.

My dark horse pick for the summer is to have this madman start a shooting war in Iran or Syria as a last chance barricade situation where he will demonstrate to an unbelieving world that he is ready to do anything to avoid a rousing defeat once the stock market and deepening recessionary reports start flooding the field.

Before you laugh, try to remember when a sitting president had such contempt for everyone in this democracy except himself- he is at war with the Supreme Court, the legislature and various states police departments, the border is a joke and everyone is starting to finally notice this guy is toxic and it won't get one bit better this summer..

Hitler is headed for the bunker

Rick Kepple said...

The thing is that the rock star destroyed me and because she wants to buy her way into heaven and cares for no one else but herself, I concluded that it is necessary to help bring about the New World Order which will lead to global war. Just as long as the United States wins, that's all that matters.

Romney or Obama. It doesn't matter. If I'm right, and I usually am, about a third of the world's population will die.

It doesn't matter if Obama or Romney wins. Both lead to destruction, but just different versions. The Antichrist must come to power, people must die and this must occur for a better world to be made.

The blonde rock star was the deciding factor; if she talked to me, I'd fight to stop it. If she ignored me, I'd help to make death happen. She's not talked to me so people must die and she chose for millions of people.

That imposter soldier? He could be Chinese studying Americans to learn how to kill us. I turned his ass in to the Army and now they can study him and we can kill them.

Rick Kepple said...

We're doomed. Our leaders are up to no good. It might even be a giant scam. And if I can put myself in a situation to make money, then I'm just being a capitalist. I learned from the best.

I need some chocolate now. All this figuring out what greedy/crazy leaders are doing stresses me out. Maybe even some chocolate chip cookie dough. Hard core.

steve buzzardo said...

re: Chris Hayes
Jim, I like this quote by Ann Coulter -

"Justin Beiber 4'11", 95 pounds - can still kick Chris Hayes' ass."

Jim McAllister said...

Middy,

I just got home and I see on Drudge where Hayes apologized for his comment. I didn't read any details but I often wonder when common sense kicks in with these guys.

I'm sure MSNBC was proud of him for such a stupid remark; they like that sort of thing. But, surely he had to know that there would be a backlash.

It all helps us as Romney is plastering O in the polls regarding veterans and the consensus is Walker will win next week in Wisconsin. Let's hope so.

We can only hope Hitler is heading for the bunker but, unfortunately, he has a ton of money more than Romney.

The good news is that so far he is not showing up that well in the early polls. Has the public finally figured this guy out?

Jim McAllister said...

Steve,

Ann Coulter is really something; she has a lot of guts. I'm glad she is on our side.

Laura Ingraham is another. How would you like to spend an evening trying to get a word in edgewise with those two?

That's funny about Bieber. What is that little guy doing scuffling with anyone? This smells like some kind of PR stunt to give him a tougher image.

I don't trust anything that is said in the entertainment business.

Rick Kepple said...

My housekeeper is here this morning and we're having a lively discussion of who is actually running the United States and why.

During the Carter Administration, Iran took hostages. No Carter bashing; I have a point. George H.W. Bush was then acting director of the CIA. Reagan runs for office, Bush is chosen as VP and remember, he was CIA. Always has been according to those unreliable stories on the Internet.

So afterwards, Bush is elected, right? Ex-CIA. We get into the first Gulf War. Bad Saddam.

Then the Clintons. I met the Clintons in 1986, and it's curious that I liked SN and FM played the White House. That same year, (86) I met Dan Quayle on the golf course and I was told that he was a VP pick for Bush. BTW, Hillary Clinton is the perfect person to stop World War III. That woman's cool under pressure.

So then George W. gets elected and he was a Christian and afraid of the curse of the year ending in zero. He was elected in 2000. He finished what his father started in Iraq.

Then Obama was elected and he's said to be ex-CIA. All this controversy about him just might be by design. Isn't it curious that the Republicans really aren't working that hard to do something about him?

So who's next? Romney. A draft dodger, or is he? The CIA has never been one for following conventional behavior.

The point is that it is entirely possible that Russia and China intend to do the United States harm and the government would not panic people by telling them the truth. No, instead they'd develop covert strategies. Sun Tzu said that if your enemy is stronger than you, feign weakness.

Isn't it curious that so many people are arming themselves and Walmart is selling assault weapons? As if by design to prepare for an invasion?

The fear thing might be to motivate us. The Cold War mentality. Romney's rhetoric about the Russians would fit the pattern. I wouldn't worry about anything. Go your Own way.

Rick Kepple said...

My housekeeper and I went fishing with Jim's friend from Phoenix. I don't think she's ever really fished before. She reads Jim's blogs though. I think she misses Phoenix.

After fishing, we sat around the camping area and it is one of the fall-back and regroup areas in case St. Louis and KC go insane. Immediately discussion fell to Bigfoot, snakes, spiders, bugs, but no mention of psy-ops, armor, air superiority, cover or concealment.

Rick Kepple said...

June is my birthday month, Jim. Dora said that she'd ask God to give me gifts for my birthday and at Christmas. I signed the agreement for an offer on my land this morning and closing will be near by birthday. I'm not going to any concerts. I have sensible things to get done. The buyer is a military veteran trained in counterterrorism. He'll be handy to have around.

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